That time of year has arrived when I watch that one film that is going to fill me up with enough venom to spew all over my computer screen. A film so unoriginal that all the Kader Khan and David Dhawan comedies, I used to frown upon as a snobbish teenager suddenly look authentic. A film which manages to somehow give Kangna Ranaut, it’s only selling point a minuscule uni-dimensional role while handing over 80% of the film to an actor who can barely mouth Hindi. Katrina Kaif speaks Hindi onscreen with more conviction… 

No, I am not done. There is more. 

  • A film which has reversed the few years of development we have tried to have in multi-cultural characters, especially Tamilians onscreen by playing a ‘predictably offensive music’ as soon as the south-Indian Boss enters the room. Not to mention he is a complete buffoon. 
  • A film whose idea of character development is to paint the lead female character as a fast & loose and then in the last 10 minutes just turn her around to a martyr. Are we back in the 60s, 70s, 80s?
  • A film with that one predictable ‘club song’. Aren’t we over those?
  • A film where the couple decide to move in together but they haven’t had sex in 2 years of college. I don’t know which generation is the writer portraying. 
  • A film where, after the couple move in together we subjected to the ‘oh so cute’ routine that make me bawl my eyes out. The house, which is in Mumbai, looks like its in Brooklyn with the exposed bricks syndrome that has hit the world. 
  • A film where each set looks like its straight out of … Irrespective of the economic level of the people owning the house. Architect, Businessman, Jobless. Doesn’t matter. We have got the same furniture for all of you. 
  • And this needs to be mentioned again because its important. A film where Kangna Ranaut is present on screen for not more than 30 minutes and she has no more than 10 dialogues. 

If you saw that ‘pee in the bowl’ dialogue and thought it was hilarious. And you think that the film would be filled up with those…please be warned. That was the only such dialogue in the entire film. You would go in wanting to watch the leading lady and instead would get only the leading man doing a really really bad impression of JGL (Joseph Gordon-Levitt). No the film is not 500 Days, thankfully. Its something even worse. A really really bad Hindi film which has ruined my Friday morning. 

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